Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
Randomize
