Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
Randomize
