He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Randomize
