Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
Randomize
