There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Randomize
