yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
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