i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Randomize
