ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
even my farts smell like vagina
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
The struggles of a small town man whore
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
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