Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
Randomize
