Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Randomize
