Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize
