In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
Randomize
