Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting

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(337): View more from Louisiana

I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?

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(480): View more from Arizona

get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch

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(773): View more from Illinois

Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal

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(425): View more from Washington

It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"

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(212): View more from New York

it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating

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(336): View more from North Carolina

Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.

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(509): View more from Washington

I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.

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