Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
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