i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
