either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
Pooping to opera.
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