We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize