im drinking this country out of the recession.
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
