I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
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