Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
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