whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
Randomize
