bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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