she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize
