the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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