she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
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