I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
Randomize
