I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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