You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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