Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
This show inspires me to have sex in space
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Randomize