I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
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