Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Randomize
