She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize
