the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
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