I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Randomize
