i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize