so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
Drunk is not a location!
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
Randomize
