Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
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