Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Randomize
