smell my finger.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
