I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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