We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize
