But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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