no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
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