the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
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