they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
