shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
Randomize
