Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize
