He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
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