We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Randomize
