No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
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